Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person

Fangs, but no fangs...

Born into a well-off French family, Sasha (Sara Montpetit, of the Louise Brooks bangs and Brooke Shields eyebrows) is going through a difficult adolescence, the kind familiar to parents of teenagers everywhere. Granted, Sasha is in her late 60s because, well, vampire years, and too old to be, essentially, still bottle-feeding. The problem: She doesn’t want to grow up and drink blood from people’s throats rather than from the handy blood-bags her exasperated but loving vampire parents stash in the fridge because, well, she’s sensitive and it’s icky. If she were one of the living she’d be the kind of teen-vegan who shames her parents for wearing leather shoes and insists that veggie cheeseburgers taste much better than the real thing.